Children need rest as well as sleep
What does the Research Say?
In the new field of neuroscience one of the most powerful tools in use is the fMRI (functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging). This procedure (it looks like an X-ray is being taken) lets us look inside the skull and see changes in blood flow in the brain as problems are tackled. We can also measure the electrical activity of different parts of the brain. The evidence being collected from labs around the world is that sleep and rest are two different processes.
During sleep, facts, word-meanings and disconnected fragments of memories are churned in blocks of sixty to ninety minutes several times a night (periods associated with Rapid Eye Movements). On a fMRI, the visual cortex and hippocampus light up indicating that these two parts of the brain are at work. Between these work periods the brain reviews recent "real" events and memories of the past. Free from deliberate activity during wakeful periods of rest fMRIs show our brains are extremely active; much more so than when we focus on routine tasks. The seat of our daydreams appears to be the 'default network' - a region of the brain that remains active when we rest or are not engaged in a focused task, but which switches off when we need to concentrate.
How much rest does our child need?
How much sleep does our child need? How much sleep do you, as a parent need (and "How will I ever get it?" you ask)? Let's talk about the difference between sleep and rest. As a culture, we have lost the structures that once provided rest and the wisdom that told us that children needed rest. We tend to keep children engaged, busy, involved and stimulated rather than provide space for rest. Rest is at the root of growth and is at the core of Dr. Gordon Neufeld's relational paradigm.
What is Rest?
Rest happens when the mind is free of stress, when it can create daydreams, luxuriate in creative play, go to other universes or simply throw up random ideas and images which might be remembered or perhaps not. When children are resting, they are freed from the hunger of attachment; they feel secure in the comfort a parent provides; they can experience desire and fear at the same time and they can live in a place where there might not be any answers. Life just is! Rest is a place or condition in which the child does not feel driven: driven to please, to succeed, to take part in, or to interact. How do we lead children to a place where they are not anxious to please, not on a constant quest for approval, for contact, for value? We can free them by taking charge of their relationships and by being fully present for them, inviting them to be with us and letting them know that we have faith that they will grow up and reach their full potential.
Anxious Children do not Learn
When children are preoccupied with making decisions about what to do, what to eat, who to play with, even which nursery school they should go to, they develop a sense that they are responsible for their own needs and this creates anxiety. In this state the body produces cortisol - a powerful hormone which interferes with development. High cortisol levels in the brain can interfere with the child's ability to integrate learning, to focus, to get along with others and to experience a sense of emotional safety. Where does sleep fit into this picture? We need sleep to allow our physical body to heal and to grow; that is a fact of life and everyone has known this without the benefit of research. What we didn't know, until recently, was that if we didn't rest while we were sleeping (or didn't get some periods of rest during the day) we simply don't learn as well as we might. Resting allows the various parts of the brain to "talk" to one another. Not only do they talk, they engage in a kind of dance in which they get into step with one another and when this happens, new material and experiences can be woven together into new arrangements so that they are more easily recalled and used in the future.
How do Rest and Sleep Affect Your Child Differently?
Sleep will allow physical development and physical maturation to occur; but your child needs rest to benefit from learning opportunities which may have come by during the day. Naps and daydreams are ways in which the brain gives itself room to develop. The child who dozes off during a class or while watching TV may not be disinterested or even over-tired; her brain may simply be taking a few moments to block out the world outside the skull while allowing the brain to process what's already been taken in. (College students who nap frequently do better on academic tests than those who cram!) Hamlet said, "To sleep, perchance to dream ... " to which we add, " ... and rest as best we can". Copyright, 2010 by Susan Dafoe-Abbey. Permission to use this material, either in English or in translation, for educational purposes is hereby granted.
