BE HERE NOW: Living Beyond Fear: Uncovering Curiosity and Inspiration

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Personal Reflections after reading Big Magic by Elisabeth Gilbert

For days, my mind has been dancing with the concept of attention being the rarest and purest form of generosity. So many questions surrounding how to unleash and live this virtue were left unanswered until a recent flight to Newfoundland opened the opportunity to read Gilbert’s book. Throughout her words, it reaffirmed that I have lived a life, in which I scurried about to gather the courage necessary to grant permission to my inside self to come forward. This has taken enormous energy and conviction and has been a barrier in giving attention to the present. However, each time I re-entered the maze searching out courage, there was some unknown treasure that uncovered itself. Maybe this little article is one of the treasures for me.

Recently, while enjoying the quiet aura of inspiration, I took notice that 50% of my clients are presenting with managing anxiety as their therapeutic goal. During the first two months of 2017, fear seems to be dominating our culture and is spreading its roots choking off the creative experience for many people. Could creativity and inspiration be the antidote to anxiety and fear?

It is no secret that we need fear to keep us safe and that fear is never invited into the ultimate

creative experience. Gilbert writes: ”Creativity asks us to enter into realms of uncertain outcomes and fear hates uncertain outcomes,” and gets in the way of being in the now. Creativity is sacred and is hungry to reveal itself. For me, my work gives me the energy of hope that creativity brings with it. The early part of each clinical day, I must stare down my own fear factor so that I can continue to be curious about what my clients bring with them that might require my help. My art wants to be made through me and I want to make it, sometimes at a cost of occasionally feeling depleted by the chemistry of fear. Neuroscience has revealed that each time we are overcome with fear, there are 2300 toxic neurochemicals dump into our bodies. Trying to find balance among noble human virtues and neurological downloads takes devotion and many deep breaths to replenish the body, preventing a fall into the pit of anxiety.

Gilbert says we must talk to our fear and stand up to our fear in order to find out what is on the

other side. She says to let life play with you a little and find a space inside yourself that wants to play. When you find your source of play, you will find a resource to manage anxiety that is boundless.

Gilbert also points out that we are not entitled, “to leap from bright moment to moment. It is how we manage ourselves between those bright moments”. Happiness seems as elusive as trying to catch a moon-beam and has become the snapshot of the perfect life so that it can be presented to the world on FaceBook or Instagram. Looking for perfection is nothing more than a deep existential angst that says over and over, I am not good enough. Clearly, the scaffolding of life requires some fear. However, relinquishing the pursuit of happiness and perfection and then taking notice of the few gaps of bright moments shining through the cracks and ruptures is the route to maintaining inquisitiveness.

“Big Magic” reminds us to check our ego at the door when we are exploring the path to courage, curiosity and inspiration. By leading with the soul which is not guided by dreams of

praise or fears of criticism and recognizing that the soul desires one thing which is WONDER (according to Gilbert), we will find our refuge in creativity and peace.

Dr. Gordon Neufeld, a Vancouver Psychologist, and a theorist whose relationship-based developmental paradigm makes it clear that the road to making sense of anxiety is to bring play back into a child’s life. He believes we have too much structure, pursue too many activities and use screen time as replacements for thriving in simple safe emotional relationships. Safe emotional relationships allow room for boredom. When we pay attention to boredom, it is unbelievably interesting (Gilbert) and makes room for us to get lost in play. Play cultivates a context in which we can experience our full selves without direction or approval. Mihaly Csikszyentimihalyi talks about finding our flow which also comes with boredom as the antidote to the fear factor. Neufeld, Csikszyentimihalyi and Gilbert are encouraging all of us to use our sensitivity/anxiety, and down times to walk through the doorway into curiosity, inspiration and creativity.

Creativity is sacred, courageous self-expression. Too much structure, activity and screens fuel anxiety which become a diversion from our inner selves and become obstruction to the best medicine of all “creativity”. We need to feel safe within ourselves to foster a capacity to BE HERE NOW, welcoming our treasures. When we are here-now we will be able to accept that paying attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.

Copyright 2017, Susan Dafoe-Abbey BIS, MEd, RP, RMFT, Authorized Neufeld Practitioner. Permission to use this material, either in English or in translation, for educational purposes, is hereby granted.